On not writing
and trusting it.
The biggest bit I’ve written was the wedding speech. Up on an unlit stage, amidst rudeness and unspeakables and bruise-colored beauty, I summoned love. In the interest of posterity, here it is:
Welcome to the reception!
I’ve known the bride for twenty years. For a long time I’ve thought of her as a sister. Ever since the 3rd grade talent show, when she dressed up as Marilyn Monroe and did a full rendtition of Diamonds Are A Girl’s Best Friend, and I got my first taste of that mix of …….weird…. and YESthat’sEPICandAMAZING, that’s pure R. I was hooked. She introduced me to hairdye, Madonna, cannibal island barbie, and how to survive middle school. As my honorary sister she’s graced me with her courage, her devotion, her wicked laugh, her always-open art sanctuary, her sense of drama, her passion, and her encyclopedic opinions. I know and I want to honor how hard she’s worked to be here today, and how lucky J is to have won her powerful, beautiful heart.
I’m not gonna do the thing where I give advice about the little things and tell you to take care of her. I don’t know shit about married life, and if you haven’t figured it out by now God help us all. I’m gonna give you some advice about big things. This girl deserves big things. Make room. She had Diamonds Are A Girl’s Best Friend memorized by 8.
Make room for champagne hot springs on the beach under a full moon meteor shower. Make room for red carpet and eight course lobster dinner. Make room for cabana massages and jungle medicine. Make room for life-size bamsters and sleeping in paint and flying with your feet on the ground. Make room for glaciers and panthers and la bufadora. Make room for Vivaldi opening for Shakira. Make room for gelato affogato under a Florentine dome looking out over all of history while David Bowie serenades you on roller skates and sexy lady-ninjas fetch campari, and more gelato.
Before I make my toast I want to share some words by Krishnamurti I first on their bookshelf earlier this year while staying with the couple:
Love, and don’t be caught in opinions and ideas about what love is or should be. When you love, everything will come right. Love has its own action. Love, and you will know the blessings of it. Keep away from the authority who tells you what love is and what it is not. No authority knows; and he who knows cannot tell. Love is something that is new, fresh, alive. It has no yesterday and no tomorrow. It is beyond the turmoil of thought. It is only the innocent mind which knows what love is, and the innocent mind can live in the world which is not innocent. Love, and there is understanding.
So here’s to tonight, and here’s to love.